Monday, February 27, 2012

Where are ALL the Perfect Christians?

Where oh where are ALL the perfect Christian's? Where is my perfect Christian life?If you are perfect...please stand up!!! Go on you seem to have to have it all and have it all together. You're perfect aren't ya? That's right neither! And today was not a perfect day. And this not so perfect christian blew her blooming top off. Yes I do have a bit of a temper. Self control is one of the fruits I struggle with. Like to have squeezed that little booger till it's head popped off today! Actually no squeezing involved just a nice swat to the head with Jasper's shoe!!! No children where harmed or involved in this momentary lapse of perfectness. Just one of Jasper's shoes... Ok Ok I'd have to add telling lies to the list of my not so perfectness if I said they were not involved or harmed in some way....they live here and have me as there MOM. Some days I wonder what God must have been thinking when he made me and gave me my blessings. Actually most days I wonder WHAT is HE thinking!!!!
So let me be clear this sinner saved by grace is no perfect nothing. Well perfect in the respect that most of us will think of as perfect. Good thing is I am and always will be the apple of HIS eye! Today I'm a bit too ripe and have a few too many sun spots on me...bordering on slightly rotten. Stress does really horrible things to otherwise very sensible people. As some of you know ...we are a NO income family at the moment...and I am stressing. Does stressing and worry mean I have no faith. Really I think NOT! NO because if we thought.."oh well no worry...God's got this...I'll just keep on keeping on." Then we would never ever turn to him. I would never pray and I would never read and I would never seek HIM. Take that as you will...Some of you will take it the wrong way. For sure I know where I am going. That is not the issue. Well I could turn from that and make a different choice. We do have free will and a choice. Let's be clear I choose GOD. It's my choice....but that does not mean I am perfect and have no worries and should not worry. That's just crazy talk when Christians portray themselves as perfect and having no worries. I feel pretty confident that a certain amount of healthy worry brings about good changes that occur only as a result of some very stressful days.
I am aware that Jesus tells us NOT to worry...So could I have this all bet! But the worry I am referring too I liken too the sorrow and anguish kind of worry that Jesus may have felt as he prayed. I mean if you are sweating blood ...I'd say there is a bit of stress! Sorry but yes when other people or circumstances take me off the path I feel the Father has hand picked and planned for me; I'm a gonna worry worry worry till I am back to where I know HE wants me to be...And here in this mess is not of HIS design. Yes I could have that all wrong I could I could...after all I am just an imperfect Christian.
But hey I do know this...Don't get in my face and tell me to shut up. I just may go all unsouthern lady like and take Jasper's shoe after you. Sorta like ya Momma and Daddy use to do when ya did something real wrong and they took a switch after you...that they made you go get. One that if it was not big enough they went and traded it in for a TREE LIMB!!! Seriously if Momma and Daddy or Granny in my case never ever worried how we were going to "turn" out...if they knew, "hey God's got this;" would they have ever bothered to tear ya leg up with that switch?'s because they were WORRIED...that you just might grow up and be...Oh of those imperfect heatherns...or worse an imperfect Christian!
(Click on the title and I posted a song for ya...go ahead...just do it!)

Sunday, February 26, 2012

The Cat That Grace Prayed For

A few weeks back Grace traveled with her father to do some of his house inspections. At one of these houses there were some cats. Grace took a fancy to one of the cats and wanted to bring it home. Of course my husband said "NO WAY'"!!! He called me on his way home and I could hear her wailing in the background. Me...being me said, "why did you not let her bring it home"? And thus there was a long discussion via phone as to what were we going to do about this poor child crying like I had never heard her cry since getting diabetes! Well of course her daddy did not go back and get this cat. So Grace, Jasper and "the dad" came home where mass pandemonium reigned. I spend the next hour telling her why she could not have the cat and why we were not going to go back and get it. I did agreed to have her dad go back and check on the cat to make sure it belonged to someone and was not just abandoned. Grace still sobbing returns to her room but calms down and seems to be ok.
Little did I know she went to her room and began to pray for the cat. She prayed for the cats safety and care and for it to know it was loved. She then prays for a cat of her own. You see sister has 2 pets; a guinea pig and a she was feeling left out in the pet owning business. SHE WANTED A CAT!!! And so she continued to whimper and sob in her room for a cat. Meanwhile family life goes on and we have dinner and go on about our usual daily routine. It gets close to bedtime...its dark and Buddy the dog has to go potty. My husband takes Buddy to go potty outside and just as he is about to finish and come in with the dog...he calls me to come outside. There is a certain tone to the call...not alarm but a you ain't going to believe this ...kind of a tone. He brings the dog in and puts him in the kennel and says..."come look!"
It is not every ofter my husband has nothing to say but he simply said..."I think I have been overruled" and then falls silent. Just as I lay eyes on A CAT coming right up the ramp to our house and promptly rubs up against my legs and then goes over to my husband and curls up next to his feet. We obviously both have a NO WAY look on our faces. I asked what are we going to do? I asked if this was the same cat? It is not. I asked if it is possible another cat could have hitched a ride. Not likely they were more than 30 miles out from the house and had made several other stops in between the house with the cat and home. So what do you do?
I came inside and asked Grace to come outside to the porch. She says NO! I call her again and I said..."Oh Grace you are so going to want to come out here right now to the front porch." With tears stains and red splotches still visible on her face...she reluctantly comes out to see me...I point to the front door. She looks confused. I say...I think Daddy and I have been overruled. She looks confused. I then bring her to the door and point to the cat. Her eyes light up like she has just won the lottery and she doesn't even know what a lottery is. She falls to the floor in a flood of tears and amazement. Crying out that..."this is the cat I just prayed for...this is my CAT!" Not even believing my hubby I asked her if she was sure it was not the cat from the house. She assures me the cat from the house was a lot different and no other cat was there that looked like this cat does. She commences to praising God out loud like I for sure have never done. You know the holding nothing back don't care who sees me...kind of THANKING GOD out loud kind of praising GOD that us adults never seem to do know matter how much we say we love and believe in GOD. The way we SHOULD all praise HIM! She then panics and says she needs food for it and a house for it and....on and on and on and on. And so....Esther is currently sunning herself on my front I type!!! Be careful what ya pray for. More so be careful what your children pray for!

Monday, February 20, 2012

What NOT to do...

Warning: This is not for the faint of heart or those with bladder control issues. Tonight after an extended illness I finally managed to get through 30 minutes of cardio and 40 minutes of yoga, pilate's, whatevers...along with weight lifting. Aaaaagh! Muscle spasms I have missed you!!! But while in all my glory working out, I was my drifting mind; that I had not shared my complete list of things NOT to do while working out. So here ya go!
10. Do not under any circumstances rub Vicks vapor rub on your forehead and then workout...especially if you think you just may actually sweat!!!
( If you for some crazy reason forget sure you are up on your first aid eye wash training!)
9. Do not let one of your feet slip off your new exercise bike during your workout. The other foot will undoubtedly take a ride of a whole new kind while you attempt to catch the other pedal! Do not lean over while trying to place your free falling foot back onto the run away will get hit in the head!!!
8. Wear cotton or dry weave/wick clothing at all times...just trust me!
7. For us well built ladies....A sports bra is a must. Do not go with out one. Ya sistas will thank you!
6. Never lay on your back and toss a weighted exercise ball straight up in the air...without a clear understanding of how that is going to feel when you catch it. More so make sure you have a clear understanding of how it is going to feel when you do NOT catch it!!!
5. Do not pass gas with tight tight exercise clothing on. I promise...IT HURTS!!!
4. It is also a very good idea to always have a good grip on your weights. Such as when lifting a 15 lb weight over you head. Should you not listen to me...I know some of you will not. Trust me you will learn to dodge and weave and dance faster than you ever imagined. Of course dodging, weaving and dancing...are exercises! Right?
3. Do not wear cheap foot wear! Sorry nothing funny about that it is the TRUTH! Your feet, legs, and back will thank you!
2. DO NOT EVER think you can not do this! Because you can! YOU CAN! It of course helps to have family to support you, a trainer who believes in you, friends to encourage you, and a God to see you through the entire span of the journey.
1. And finally...having not followed the above advice...Should you find that you indeed DID rub Vicks Vapor Rub on your forehead and chest in an attempt to help you breath while working out despite the worst cold of your life...DO NOT SCRATCH ANY PRIVATE PARTS!!! I do not care how bad it itches...JUST DON"T!