Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Somedays It's Hard To Walk

Not sure if I walked or crawled today. Still thinking and pondering on it...the day that is...and of course it is not over just yet. I originally wanted to lighten the mood and write something funny today. At least that was my plan this morning. But life happened to occur earlier than it usually does and well like so many other times...my MOOD changed!!! So yesterday I asked my hubby about his prayer needs or requests. Who knew that was going to lead to a fight. So he thinks and says..."well just that the unemployment payment is the same this week and everything works out like they said it would." Repeat! What???? He had spoken to me two or three days before and had given me all the details(or so I thought) regarding the unemployment benefit payments. During that previous conversation I was told that everything was fine for this week and although the money would be tight, we would still have enough to pay the mortgage payment. In my mind I had tossed that little heavy worry to the side and had trusted in him that everything was ok because he said it was. Mistake! So this morning I checked the bank account and of course he did not even come near in getting his normal amount of benefits. Thus; not enough money for the mortgage payment. Now this is nothing new as far as not having enough money. But he just signed papers (last week) with the mortgage company saying he would make our payments on time and in full or forfeit the house to foreclosure. Anyways so I blew it yesterday and today gets no better. The tension in the house was way high this morning. So I did not even ask about a prayer request. He's totally depressed and begins to mope around. This makes me so want to puke. So then I'm staring at this list of prayer items I am to pray for regarding my husband and guess what is number one, two, and three and the list??? Pray for his wife, his work and his finances! Oh are you serious? Me Pray for me!...Well as you can imagine...and even if you can not....I was none too successful with that task either. I did however, stop in my tracks and pray for my husband as he was in the process of learning a very Biblical lesson and he was hurting. (2 Thessalonians 3:10) Well I tried to at least but my heart was not into it. Then the rest of today my heart has ached and my conscience nagged at me because I could not force my self to pray. So today I crawled with the Lord. Ever so slowly I died to self and my MOOD changed. I then opened up to my husband and shared my feelings about a difficult situation I am dealing with regarding some of my women friends. Well..........would you believe? He suggested that I pray about it before approaching the situation and speaking up about my hurt feelings. Yes you read that right! He suggested I pray! I was so proud of him I about peed my pants, but then if I had I would have just added to my own laundry pile so why bother!!! Which leads me to two things: 1. It's OK to crawl! 2. This scripture; Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And now that I am done crawling for the day I think I shall end it with some peaceful sleep as I go to the Father in prayer....

Monday, June 28, 2010

You want me to WHAT????

I just printed off my Completing Him Challenge to do list this am. I am suppose to pray for my husband daily this week. And for bonus pray and fast on one of those days. What? Oh my dear do you not know I am doing good Not to kill him!!! My morning read started off with Psalm 119. I read 1- well I'm not sure where I got to because kept going back to verse 1-8. Blessed are those whose ways are blameless, who walk according to the law of the Lord. Blessed are they who keep his statutes and seek him with all their hearts. That is 1-2. 7 reads I will praise you with an upright heart as I learn your righteous laws. Honesty y'all are going to be surprised how many times the Bible speaks of "walking", "to walk in" or "to walk with." So I read these verses and my first halting point was blameless you must be joking...Hmmm? And then in the second verse they who keep his statutes and seek him. Are you Blameless? Me neither! So what is it talking about? Well...go deeper a bit perhaps. I am thinking it means a blameless heart as could be seen in your life through your actions and words. And are you seeking the Lord with all your heart or just half so so doing it... Then in verse 7 I am given a bit of peace of mind in that it reads "as" I learn. So does God cut you some slack? Depends! Where is your heart?....And with that... I need to go ask my husband if he has any specific prayer request today! Oh y'all pray for me this is going to be hard!!!!............ ( For those wondering I am reading the NIV of the Holy Bible....well I read several different ones KJ, NKJ but the NIV is the one I have in BIG BOLD I'm going blind type print...so that's the one I will reference the most.)

Sunday, June 27, 2010

My Walk

My Walk refers to my walk with the Lord. I am a Christian. Therefore, the Bible is my standard. Do I live up to that standard? Good question! Which leads me to this scripture: Hebrews 10:14 because by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy. Did you catch that? Read it again. No this does not mean I am perfect by the terms you and I define perfect. Far from it! This means HE loves me and I am precious and perfect in HIS eyes. And I am more than just your run of the mill everyday old ordinary speck of humanity. I am HIS and I am "being made holy." This is not to say that I am already there. That my friends is the journey; the walk. My Walk.......