Monday, February 20, 2012

What NOT to do...

Warning: This is not for the faint of heart or those with bladder control issues. Tonight after an extended illness I finally managed to get through 30 minutes of cardio and 40 minutes of yoga, pilate's, whatevers...along with weight lifting. Aaaaagh! Muscle spasms I have missed you!!! But while in all my glory working out, I was my drifting mind; that I had not shared my complete list of things NOT to do while working out. So here ya go!
10. Do not under any circumstances rub Vicks vapor rub on your forehead and then workout...especially if you think you just may actually sweat!!!
( If you for some crazy reason forget sure you are up on your first aid eye wash training!)
9. Do not let one of your feet slip off your new exercise bike during your workout. The other foot will undoubtedly take a ride of a whole new kind while you attempt to catch the other pedal! Do not lean over while trying to place your free falling foot back onto the run away will get hit in the head!!!
8. Wear cotton or dry weave/wick clothing at all times...just trust me!
7. For us well built ladies....A sports bra is a must. Do not go with out one. Ya sistas will thank you!
6. Never lay on your back and toss a weighted exercise ball straight up in the air...without a clear understanding of how that is going to feel when you catch it. More so make sure you have a clear understanding of how it is going to feel when you do NOT catch it!!!
5. Do not pass gas with tight tight exercise clothing on. I promise...IT HURTS!!!
4. It is also a very good idea to always have a good grip on your weights. Such as when lifting a 15 lb weight over you head. Should you not listen to me...I know some of you will not. Trust me you will learn to dodge and weave and dance faster than you ever imagined. Of course dodging, weaving and dancing...are exercises! Right?
3. Do not wear cheap foot wear! Sorry nothing funny about that it is the TRUTH! Your feet, legs, and back will thank you!
2. DO NOT EVER think you can not do this! Because you can! YOU CAN! It of course helps to have family to support you, a trainer who believes in you, friends to encourage you, and a God to see you through the entire span of the journey.
1. And finally...having not followed the above advice...Should you find that you indeed DID rub Vicks Vapor Rub on your forehead and chest in an attempt to help you breath while working out despite the worst cold of your life...DO NOT SCRATCH ANY PRIVATE PARTS!!! I do not care how bad it itches...JUST DON"T!

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